stuck in the snow

It's very cold

Monday, July 11, 2005

My bike ride

Today I decided to take my mom's bike out for a ride since I had nothing better to do. My mom likes to buy really old bikes after they have been fixed up, unfortunately, they always fall apart in about a month so she always has to go buy new ones. I don't have a bike for some reason. The bike is some racing bike from the 70's and it was a very unpleasant compared to a mountain bike, the kind that don't hurt you butt and pelvic region. Any way I was toddling around the trail, and I noticed that the other bikers had amazing legs, long and toned, the kind that actually look good in spandex. Hmmm, that could be me one day. Actually my legs aren't that bad, except for the fact that my left calf is fatter than my right because I had a stupid running injury and now I have a lot less muscle definition in my left leg, it's only noticeable to me, but I guess that's the way it always is.
As I was biking, I came to the decision to buy my own bike, a mountain bike with one of those gel seats, because my ass was really starting to hurt. I was passing a whole range of people down the trail thingy, including two child prostitutes. They were about 7, with thick black eyeliner smudged over their eyes, cheap skanky clothing and stuffed bras (or illegal implants). As they walked together, arms linked, the shorter blonde gave me a dirty look. Probably something to do with the crappy bike I was riding. I noticed how out of place breasts look when there is no hip development whatsoever, which is probably derived from me being pissed off that a seven year old managed to have bigger tits than me. After the child prostitute encounter I headed onwards...until little tiny bugs started to attack me. Crap!!!! I clumsily turned my bike around, and raced out of the bug forest and then decided to head back home, mainly because of the excuciating pain my butt was enduring. Ow, it's so painful. I raced back home but halfway there I was forced to slow down because of a clump of laughing boys (the old kind). That smells fimiliar... I suddenly realized that they were smoking pot, in front of everyone in broad daylight. I smiled with pride, Canada is the only country where you can commit midly illegal crimes and not get in trouble because everyone is too passive and embarrassed to do anything. Oh, Canada. I passed the child prostitutes again too, and received another dirty look, but to give them a break, I'd be pissed off if I was a child prostitute. I finally made it home just before my ass outwardly screamed for some morphine injections. I seriously bet that every bike racer in the world has butt implants.

Monday, July 04, 2005


God I am so bored. I have to call my dear friend Amanda today so we can make plans to do something. I owe her because I "could not" come to one of her boring dinner outings at some crap restaurant. Me and Amanda have known each other since we were three, and as the years progressed I went through many transformations (or “awkward stages”), and many self discoveries, all of them guided by challenges and problems that I was forced to face (nothing that extreme, usually to do with my rebelliousness). I always noticed that Amanda never had many problems; besides the occasional fights with her sister she was always quite happy and pretty much leading a perfect life. We remained best friends until we were 12, me wild and crazy, wearing eighties style leggings and cutting my hair off, and her quiet and conservative, wearing little GAP cardigans. But once we hit junior high, things really started to change. I wasn’t in any of the same classes as her, I was with my horseback riding friend Monique, and then I met Steph in our French immersion classes together and at horseshows. Monique and Steph were both much more fun to hang out with, and as thoughtless as it is, I started to choose them over Amanda. Although it wasn’t as if I had totally abandoned Amanda, I still saw her outside of school, and a few times a week I went over to her house for lunch with some of her friends when I got sick of the tries and tribulations of the group me, Monique and Steph belonged to. I always knew I wouldn’t have to deal with any drama whilst with Amanda and her gang, nothing ever happened, we all sat there, ate our lunches and watched Arthur. Well throughout the years Amanda has barely changed at all, besides her new thing of going out to dinner at places that are extremely expensive that began in the ninth grade. She’s just…too innocent. There’s just nothing bad about Amanda, nothing daring, she’s just so bleak. She might as well be a talking placenta or something. Oh god I feel awful for trashing Amanda, what has she ever done to me? But I suppose it is good to get my feelings out there. But it's not as if I don't put any effort into it either. I usually start to talk about something and then ask her about it, but I always receive a one answer reply: Yes, No, Maybe, Yea, Ok. How am I supposed to work with that? How? I mean we're teenagers, we should be having wild parties, doing lines of coke off of each other's asses (ok not that wild), not politely sitting at a restraunt talking about nothing. Ok? OK? Yes, you can have fun at a restraunt with your friends, but not when everyone else is so conservative, and when it's too expensive and the food sucks. Oh yea, and no one else tips so you end up having to tip like, twelve dollars.