stuck in the snow

It's very cold

Friday, March 25, 2005

"Crack is wack"!

YES! Lent is finally over! I have to say, giving up crack was hard, really hard, but I made it through 40 very long days. And I'm proud. But now it's over and I'm collecting up my cash so I can sneak out and get some good stuff. Yes I know, I know, "Don't do drugs", "Crack is wack" (shut up Whitney, you freaking hypocrite)...but I miss it! I NEED it! Besides, I've really been packing on the pounds, withdrawal makes you gain weight like crazy! Just look at Courtney Love.
No...I don't do crack, but I gave it up for Lent anyway, it makes sense to me okay? I was never even baptized and I don't go to church so it means if everything in the Bible is true, I'm going to Hell anyway, so why not bend the rules a little? No, wait, God "forgives" so before I die all I have to do is feel bad about my sins and I'm good.
This all reminds me of this crazy church girl I went to school with, everything she wore had to be plain and below her knees, but that was a good thing because she didn't shave her legs. She had this crazy idea that anyone who was of a different religion (not Christian), homosexual, did drugs, had an eating disorder, actually any mental disorder, wore anything nice, or stood up for their rights were committing the devil's sins. I was SO offended that I came up with my own religion right then and there, RACHELISM. But then I decided that would be too obvious so I changed it to EVIANISM, because water is pretty important and I like Evian's logo the best. And then I decided the god should be my name and Evian combined, to make RAVIAN. Woah, that's completely fab. So I told her that her religion sounded pretty cool (I mean if this is what she believes in I'm not going to discriminate against her, well not to her face anyway) and I told her about mine after she had finished trying to convert me. Well I basically told her that RAVIAN is pretty laid back, so you can do what ever you want, except for hurting other people or being some sort of Nazi fascist because if you do that Ravian gets really pissed off and something really bad will happen to you. Uh, and when you die everything is a big cosmo party and you can eat what ever you want and not gain weight. Well I guess she didn't like my religion because she started to talk about performing an exorcism on me or something (seriously), but I was like what ever and went back to sending e-cards to my friends instead of doing my Geography project.

Sunday, March 20, 2005

OH F*CK

Wow I haven't posted in a very long time, I guess nothing has really happened to me, which in a way is a good thing. Well, except for my encounter with another insect. This encounter, was far, far worse than my encounter with a giant ant a while back, or when I saw a giant spider in my grandmother’s house a few years ago. The other day I had gotten off the treadmill after a nice refreshing run. I was feeling pretty good except I really, really had to pee (running will do that to you) so I pranced to the nearest washroom, which happened to be in the basement (where the treadmill and my Dad's exercise bike is, we call it a gym, which is pretty stupid). The basement washroom is always pretty gross, mostly because my Dad and my brother use it so it never gets cleaned. It even had a small colony of long legged spiders at one time, but they left after my Mom went crazy with the bleach. Anyway I opened the door and walked in, about to pee my pants, and saw something on the wall right beside the toilet. OH F*CK! To be honest it was probably the most disgusting thing I've ever seen in my life. Its legs were writhing and twitching out of its long, thick body. I saw a little tiny spider skitter away like mad as the creature started to turn in its direction. Legs were sticking out every where, getting longer and thicker towards the end, with giant, fat legs protruding right at the back. It was creeping slowly on the wall, and jerking in a sickening way. I just stood there, unable to move, I was completley stunned by its absolutley horrific appearance. It looked like a deformed and elongated spider, with extra limbs. The thing suddenly stopped moving and clung to the wall with some obvious effort, it was so huge that it was fighting gravity, even with its millions of legs. I cautiously backed out of the wash room, feeling slightly nauseated, and looked around wildly to make sure there weren’t more wondering around. I ran to the nearest bug-free washroom, which was a relief but the image of that insect (some sort of giant centipede?) was still alive in my head, crawling around inside my mind, my imagination warping it. I was scared it would kill me and feed on my flesh or something...Yes it was that big!
I told my parents so they both went down and looked for it in the washroom, but they couldn't find it. You know what that means? IT COULD BE ANYWHERE! ANYWHERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Friday, March 04, 2005

uhhghh

I have so much homework...I want to cry. I havent watched T.V. for TWO weeks...that isn't healthy. I have to write an essay and for some reason none of my previous teachers bothered to teach us how to write essays. Good thing my mom's an english professor...but still. I can feel my brain collapsing...it's not a nice feeling.