stuck in the snow

It's very cold

Monday, May 31, 2004

Half way to 30

O god, today's my birthday. I am now 15, fifteen! 15 years of my life is completely over! And in my opinion, I completely screwed it up. There are so many things I wish I had done, especially one time in grade six (I was 11), my teacher got so mad at me for not doing my homework that she started to yell at me:
I walked out side, and wasn't really sure where I was suppose to go so I just stood there by the door, in the raging blizzard. I was so upset and I felt like I had completely screwed everything up and tears started pouring down my face, then freezing to it. It wasn't fair! The kids that beat up everybody else got better treatment from her than I did. There was even one kid who put this little boy in the hospital, and all he got were a few detentions. Well I got five detentions, had to clean the desks, put up all the chairs and was now standing outside at risk of frostbite, all I had done was not doing my homework a few times, I did fine on my tests and projects which pretty much made up for it anyway. Some of the kids could still see me crying out the window, and they told the teacher that I was still outside (apparently I had been out there for about an hour), my teacher got one of the kids to tell me I was supposed to go to the principal’s office right away. Fine! Well I stormed away, super pissed off, and suddenly a thought occurred to me, maybe I could run away...not far, just to the end of the field where all the trees were, but far enough that they wouldn't be able to find me. I would be sheltered enough and would be pretty warm anyway. I stopped and thought about it for a long, long time. What would happen to me if I just left? I tried to turn but I could not do it. The thought of the unknown future terrified me, and I walked forward into the school. I will never forgive myself for not having the courage to take control over the situation. Sure, maybe it wouldn't have been the best choice but I think it would have saved me from allot of the self doubt I've had over the years.
Any way, after that little story, where was I? O yes, 15, half way to 30, which is half way to 60,which is half way to 120, which is half way to...well lets just hope they have that whole stem cell thing worked out by then!
Allot of people I know are happy about their birthdays, they have a big party and buy a big cake and open tons of presents, but to me it doesn't really work out. It's not that I don’t have any friends, or that I have maniac parents, it's that bad things ALWAYS happen during and around the time of my birthday. I can remember tons of times I had attempted birthday parties, but they all went down the drain. One time I was about 6 and was running down the side walk, tripped and skidded on the pavement in front of all my friends. They all laughed at me (nice friends) and it left me covered in blood and ruined my favourite dress. Another, more recent time I invited all my friends to laser-quest, but it turned out they were all mad at each other for one thing or another. I spent the whole time playing Dr. Phil, trying to fix their problems. They would all snap back and tell me to tell one another that they could go *@#% themselves. Eventually they all teamed up on me and said that I wasn’t being a very good friend. I “forgot” o hand out the goodie bag that year. Well so much for that. I stopped having birthday parties because they just ended up in disasters, but even then the bad luck didn't stop. Two years ago on my birthday, I found out my then-pony had hurt his leg, and it would take four to five months for it to heal. I spent the whole day hearing my coach and the owner of the stable that it was my fault and kept implying that I was a bad rider, even though the vet had said Twister (my old pony) had probably hurt it slipping in the MUDDY field. Twister was in so much pain and it was the worst thing ever to see him like that.
Well this birthday is no different, It is raining, I have some sort of flue and feel like sh*t. No one has called to wish me happy birthday (I call all my friends on their birthdays), I got practically no cards from anyone, not even my relatives while they gave my brother tons, with tons of cash included. I am talking to my best friend on IM and she has completely forgotten it is my birthday. Sorry for being so negative, I'll talk about my trip to the doctor later on, then my trip to Toronto (which isn’t really that interesting anyway).
Well I hope no one ever has to experience the crappy birthdays that I continuously have. Have A Nice Day :). Cheerio!

Wednesday, May 26, 2004

money money money...

For the first time in years my parents are actually fighting, and they are fighting over money. You see, my mom really wants to send me to boarding school in Ireland (which by the way, I want to go too) but it would take like, half of her salary (nice school lol) so she asked my dad (my parents are surprisingly still married) if he could pay some of it too since he never spends money and she literally pays for everything, the trips, the house, my horseback riding, all he pays are the cable T.V. bills. Now in the past year I started to notice my dad never paid for anything, my mom was always taking out her cards to pay for things, ever since I can remember. Well if you even ask my dad about money he goes into this big rage and starts to act all vague, once I asked him why he never paid for anything he said "Because I have no money!"

"Well you make like, three times more than mom"

"Well all of that goes to income tax!"

"Even with income tax you still make about twice more"

"Well there’s more taxes!"

"For what?"

"For the schools and hospitals and stuff!"

"Well how much money does that cost?"

"I dunno!"

"Well you should know"

"Well I don't!"

"Why wont you find out, I mean what if someone's taking your money?"

"They aren't!"

"How do you know if you don't even know what’s going on with your money?"

And it went on and on like this until I finally decided he was addicted to crack, like my friend Steph's dad. He spent all of their money and they had to move into this tiny town house in the city, out of this gorgeous huge house just outside the country. I was really pissed off, but it made everything so clear, so this is why he acts so weird! But then I told my mom what I thought and she started to laugh and explained to me why he couldn't be a crack addict. So now I am very curious as to where the hell all our money is going, my dad has a responsibility to actually pay for things you know. My dad went on the internet to show my mom how much money he really has in the bank account, 12,000. Now this is not allot for a guy who makes WAAAAAY more then 12,000, according to this he has spent over 40,000 dollars in the past 9 months on what ever the hell he spends all his money on. Then my dad decided someone was taking his money...and my mom thought he should check with the bank to see how much money was actually taken out. Then he went all in a rage and stormed out. I highly doubt someone is taking his money, because it would have come to a shock to him and he would have said "Oh My God..." as he stared at the computer screen. My dad's an idiot.

Tuesday, May 25, 2004

blinded by something very ugly.

Today in geography class something very disturbing happened to me. I was sitting there sort of evesdropping on a two person consversation that went sort of like this:
"We did it!"
"At spare, I can't beleive we did it!"
"Did it hurt?"
"Like hell man!"
"She kept on lifting up her shirt and saying 'I can't beleive I did it with you!'"
"Good one man, nice"
"Do you want to see?"
At that moment I turned my head ever so slightly to see this guy lift up his shirt, he had a nipple piercing! And it wasn't just any old nipple peiercing, he had a really skinny chest so his ribs stuck out, and there were no man-boobs or anything, just this little tiny nipple and this big thing popping out of it! It was so gross! I wanted to barf. Usualy I don't really mind nipple piercings, I mean I'm not a big fan of them but whatever, but this one was seriously deformed! I the rest of the day I had this discusting mental image in my brain...

I need some pills....

Sunday, May 23, 2004

Très Boring

Nothing nearly remotely interesting has happened to me in the past few days...well actually on Thursday I missed the whole day of school to see some cheap and equally boring play, I wont tell you what it is called in case the team who did it happens to come up to this blog and find out that I think they're play sucks (I'm too compassionate for that). Although if I did tell you, you would never have the misfortune of seeing it like I did...o well, it was called Strawberries in January. I had a riding lesson that was really fun though, my coach let us go on a hack (a trail ride) through the forest and my pony actually had tons of energy and then after we jumped a course and Tyson (my pony) was jumping really well, with his knees up and lots of scope (if you don't horse back ride I'm sorry if I'm confusing you:)!).
Any way on Friday I was "sick" (fine I had an essay due that I had not done) and just relaxed in bed reading magazines and then watched The View and Oprah...Friday was a good day.
Yesterday (Saturday) my family went to Toronto for my brother's birthday, I stayed behind because well, me and my brother hate each other and it would be horror for the Toronto population if we both came. I was trying to plan to do something with my friends (the ones I actually want to see and are not dead beats go to a different school) but they were all studying for exams, unfortunately my school is not preparing at all for exams...which is quite stupid because they're only in about three weeks! I tried to study but got distracted by the trampoline in my backyard, and spent a really long time pretending I was an acrobat on it, until my neighbours came into their backyard and started looking at me funny. I watched T.V. the rest of the day and nearly died of boredom. Today I have no clue what I'm going to do, but I am feeling really upset, I think too much boredom is bad for my mental health.

I am seriously considering buying a small Island

Wednesday, May 19, 2004


Warning: A little bit gory, not for weak stomachs

Well I was getting ready to go to bed, in my pj’s and face cream, when I noticed that the tiny door leading to my attic (which is in my room) was open. I got up a little annoyed(I would have left it opened but I get really paranoid at night and think theres evil things lurking up there) and went over to close it. As soon as I moved the door I saw something scurry on the edge of the door frame, IT WAS AN ANT! And not just any ant, a HUGE ant! I am serious, it was probably the biggest ant I had ever seen in my whole life! Well I have a thing about insects and creepy crawly things, whenever I see them I do this mini spaz attack, so I did the mini spaz attack, which is sort of a twitchy "get away" reflex, and when I was done I looked at it again. It was black and it looked like three berries had been stuck together and numerous legs had grown on each side, it sort of looked like it was going to explode and was round and shiny and grotesque looking eew. I could have slammed the door shut and that would have been the end of it, but that would have been cruel, and what if he had other giant ant friends that would come to avenge his death? Maybe If the food chain played a part it wouldn’t be so cruel and evil, I thought. Well my cat Pachy likes to eat bugs (it’s really fun to watch him jump up and catch little moths), so I picked him up off my bed and took him to the ant. Pachy didn’t really see it so I tapped the door to make the ant move a little bit.
Rachel: “Go get it Pachy!”

Pachy: “Meow, meow, prrrrrrrrr…prrrrrrrrrr”

Rachel: “Come on Pachy! You can do it! Mmmmm Look at that yummy ant!” (eew).

Pachy: “Prrrrrrr….prrrrrrrrr…prrrrrrrrrrr…prrrrrrrrr…prrrrrrrrr…prrrrrrrrrr….prrrrrrrr.”

Pachy started to lick my hand and then he left and jumped back up on to my bed. So much for that idea. Well then I thought I could close the door a little bit so the giant ant wouldn’t be able to get into my room but it would still be alive. Ok, so I pushed the door so it wasn’t open but it wasn’t closed, there we go! Just one more check to see it’s all right, I pulled the door open again and looked down at the ant. EWWWWWWWWWW it was half squished…(oops). Well this time I did this super mini spaz attack, ewwwwwww it was half squished, how disgusting! lol. It was sort of twitching and it looked like it was in pain, so finally I decided to put the ant out of it’s misery and slammed the door shut. Then I did the biggest mini spaz attack of all, seriously, I freaked my cat out, it was totally squished all over the door.... Then I heard some skittering on the ceiling. Skitter skatter skitter skatter. The giant ant’s giant ant friends were coming to get me, omg!!!! Ewwwwww, I don’t want to die this way, ewww what if they take me and start feeding on my flesh? That would be such a gross way to die. I always imagined my death to be tres chic, like being 105 but only looking 25 (thank you plastic surgeons!) and wearing nothing but pearl-covered shoes and custom made pink lingerie. I would lie tragically on the luxurious rooftop of my Penthouse until my lover came and found me and would instantly start sobbing over my dead body, I would die of natural causes of course. Yes, that would be a very chic way of dying. Then more skittering awoke me from my the chicest way for me to die dream, OMG!!!! I was having the biggest most distorted mini spaz attack ever. EWWWWWWW! Suddenly I saw something run across the window, if that was an ant it was FREAKING HUGE! It was the size of a squirrel!I will never live to be 105, the ants will take me down to their evil lair to their queen and she will feed on my dis-mangled body! Then a nother scutter accross my window,

O wait that was a squirrel… oooo so that was the skittering I had heard on my roof top. I forgot about the squirrels.

Tuesday, May 18, 2004


I want one!

You know what I say: "For a free country you need equal rights."
Well it took a while but it finally happened, gay marriges are now legal in Massachusetts! Or you could have come up to Canada and got married, and bought some pot while you were there. (Just for those pre-marital jitters!)

Saturday, May 15, 2004

The Effects Of Madonna on Llamas.

Just looking back on a few memories of where I used to horseback ride (I moved to another stable last year, long story and very boring) and I came across this one:
The owner of the stable me and my friends rode at decided to take care of a friend's llama for her during the summer. Me and my friends were quite intrigued by this creature because we had never actually seen one so close before. Any way we had lots of fun with this llama, whose name was Kazoo, getting him to jump jumps and stuff, but we never really got close to him because he was slightly crazy.
I had recently bought a pair of chaps (to horseback ride in) which quite resembled a pair that Madonna wore in a recent video (yeehaw!), the one where she is dressed like a cowgirl and rides one of those electric bull things. Any way the song was stuck in my head so I started dancing to it like the way Madonna did in the video, the whole hip action going on and everything! We had a good laugh until the owner decided to make us all retrieve Kazoo from his field so he could be fed indoors. We all became very giddy at the thought of what would happen, Kazoo was quite mentally unstable after all. Everybody was too scared to get him, so the brave Xena warrior that I am, I stepped in to the field to face what ever fate may await me. I started to walk over to him, talking soothingly as not to freak him out, but when he saw me he started to back away. I started to feel bad for him, he was a stunning creature after all and maybe he had been abused as a young llama, so I bent down to pick up some butter cup flowers that he could eat.
That was when my brilliant friend yelled out "Rachel! Do the Madonna dance!" It seemed like a good idea at the time, really! So I starting, swinging my hips in my chaps just like Madonna did o so gracefully, and suddenly Kazoo perked his ears forward and started to walked slowly towards me. It was working! After about a second he started to wiggle his little tail and then walked faster, this was such a cute little llama! When he made his way over to me his eyes were sort of bulging out of his head as I reached up to put his head collar on when all of a sudden he reared up and started towards me. HE WAS TRYING TO MOUNT ME! I HAD to get away, so I ran the opposite direction, but he was after me...omg omg! Must get away! I swerved like those animals running away from the predator on The Discovery channel, while my friends were all paralysed with laughter, this wasn't funny, this was serious! Every time I swerved, he lunged towards me, this was one desperately perverted llama! Then I saw my only hope at the far end of the field, a thick overgrown spot of plants and small trees, just big enough for me to squeeze through. I sprinted super fast and jumped into the mass of vegetation(see diagram below), I made it!!! Kazoo just stood there looking disappointed (eew) and walked away. I stayed there until my friends got our coach to bring him in for us. This was a very traumatizing experience, and I don't think I will ever get over it, I'm just glad I made it to those plants in time...
P.S. I love llamas! I think they're so pretty and sweet and they have done alot of cute things, like bite my brother, lick my hand and drop a flower in my hand, aww! But Kazoo was just a bad apple and does not represent any other llamas in any way:(.
Here is a diagram I made to show me running away...

Friday, May 14, 2004

All moved in

I just moved my blog (is this moving?) to a prettier place because it was very ugly before. I think of it as moving out of some bleak, bland studio into an apartment in The Pierre. Like it?(ok all I did was change the template and add a picture but I still worked very hard finding out how to add a picture!)
Wow I blogged alot today, dont worry I did it in class at school!

little boutique down the road!

I just found the cutest little boutique down the road, and the stuff there is so nice! The woman there was too tanned and had bad skin because of it and I took it as a reminder from God to keep that SPF on. Any way I bought this adorable scenery print skirt (not too unlike the Prada ones), a tiny pink tank top and the most stunning pink chiffon dress. I felt like some sort of fairy/angel creature in that dress and it almost convinced me I could fly (or was that the bottle of pills I had this morning?jks)! Anyway I left the store feeling sooo happy, I just simply LOVE shopping, even if it does leave my wallet empty!

The Funeral

Yesterday when I went home for lunch, I did not expect something as tragic and horrible as death. I had gone upstairs to reapply my sunscreen when I heard my cat yowling unusually loud. Poor kitty! I walked down stairs to see what the matter was when I saw it on the third last stair , just lying there with it’s eyes lifelessly staring into space, never to see again.
“Pachy!” (my cat) I couldn’t believe this had happened, again! Pachy had killed another chipmunk and brought it as a gift to us (very heart-warming). Well I praised my cat and brought him upstairs so he wouldn’t see me take the chipmunk outside (he wouldn’t understand) and decided it would be right to have a little funeral for the chipmunk. So I put it down on the ground (not with my hands, it was on a dustbin) and picked a nice place in the garden and started to dig with this rusty shovel. When I had finally finished digging I decided it wouldn’t be very respectful to just chuck it in the dirt, so I picked some grass and some forget-me-nots and lined the bottom with them. Throughout the garden everything was still as I lowered the poor thing into the ground. I picked up some dirt and gently sprinkled it on top of it, then said a little prayer, and then gradually sprinkled more and more dirt until it was finally buried, but something just didn’t fell complete. I came to the conclusion that I should make a small bouquet for the chipmunk, since my cat did kill it and everything , and I walked around picking the prettiest tulips and some other flowers. I eventually placed them together so everything was balanced and looked perfect and placed them down very gently on top of the buried chipmunk. I then kneeled down and kissed the ground, this was my way of saying sorry.

Wednesday, May 12, 2004

Frat Boys

I am writing this as my mom is blasting her WorldWarII time music which is actually quite pleasant.
Any way, the other day I was walking back to school as I had gone home for lunch. It was very hot so I took off my baby blue zip-up shirt and revealed my (low neckline) tank top. You would be surprised how many perverted old men take walks at lunch time. The sun was beating down on me and was making me feel very tired and put me in a sort of trance, my legs were walking but my brain was sleeping, it was very relaxing. I was pleasantly walking along when all of a sudden I heard guys driving past me yell "OOOOOOOOO!!!!!" I jumped, momenteraly terrified and looked to my left to see a bunch of frat boys pointing and grinning at me as they whizzed past. I'll admit I was slightly flattered, but more discusted than anything. What happened to the good old days when males addressed women as miss and opened doors for them? This isn't the first time I have gotten unwanted attention from older-than-me males, but I usually snap back with extremely rude comments that shut them up (ei. go fuck yourself, you know no one else will) but this time they were gone before I could even open my mouth. Maybe this is why I prefer gay males, straight ones are so vulgar.

Don't you think this is cheating?

Well recently I was talking to my good friend Monique on msn and she asked me to re-add Steph onto my msn list, Steph is a girl I was very good friends with last year in middle school (she was also such a bitch but I put up with her, big mistake) and then I got in a "fight" with her on msn around last december (I was so sick of her and besides we go to different schools now so it wasnt a big deal) and deleted her off my list. Any way, I re-added her yesterday and today we were both on at the same time today so we started chatting. We caught up on each other's life, how school was and how horseback riding was, and then we came to clothes. Now I like to think I have a very chic sense of style very un-like girls my age who dress like prostitutes (like Steph). I usually wear black ballet flats and good jeans and a cute top with a nice handbag(matching, of course), I have some nice designer items too, but usually only wear them for something nice. Anyway, Steph has a sort of "gangsta" style as she likes to call it, she dresses like the girls in rap videos. Then she asked me if I had any thing Louis Vuitton, I said yes, a blue mini monogram tote which my mom brougt me back from London, Steph said she had some too a "3 Louis Vuitton bags, scarf, belt, hat keychain and viser" I thought this was a bit odd, considering she recently had to move into a smaller house and all this stuff would probably add up to way over a thousand dollars. Then she said she had a pair of Gucci Air Force Ones and her Louis Vuitton shoes were also Air Force Ones. Now, Air Force Ones are Nike basketball shoes, so I was pretty sure her shoes were probably rip off fakes and this led me to asking her where got these shoes. Steph showed me this webstie: and I noticed something, the designer items were all like 90% cheaper than they should be. Plus the Air Foce Ones were shipped from a factory in China: Yes I know the vendors on the corner sell fake bags but the thing is, everybody knows they're fake so it doesnt really take away value from the actual product, but these are being adverstised to people as real which totally takes away from the value and nobody will think anything special of the craftmenship. This is pissing me off so much! I know I sound so conservative, but I just don't think it is fair to advertise it as "real" when it isnt.

Tuesday, May 11, 2004

I want to be a rich only child.

I hate my family so much! School was boring, as usual, home was pretty bad though. My practically deformed obese brother (eew) attacked me when I asked him to leave me alone to make my smoothie,he was just hanging around to bother me,and he freaked out and started spazzing out and started to attack me, well I had no other choice to grab the two bread knives to drive him away, well when he would not go away I started to pretend attack him (you know like in the movies) I know it was dangerous but he was a really angry and a 5'4 180 pound 12 year old (yes he's twelve and he'll die of high cholesterol at 20) has a slight advantage because he can sit on me (5'3,110). Any way big fight and my poor cat was terrified because my brother nearly stepped on him five times, I chased fatso away, but not before he threw his glass of water at me and missed by a few miles (I guess being morbly obese gives you a disadvantage aim-wise). It smashed on the floor. Then my dad came and decided not to pay for my extravegant mother's day gift that I wanted to give to my mom so she would stop hating me (I would pay, but since I am alone saving up for college I can't, my parents think that I am retarted, even though my grades say other wise). I told him that morbly-obese child threw the glass at me and it smashed on the floor and I offered to clean it up, he was like I'll clean it up, and then told me I should be cleaning it up, even though I offered to before, what the hell? Any way my mom comes home and since my parents adore him and despies me, my mom yells at me and says my brother has cuts on his hands because I was attacking him with knives. I want to get one thing straight, the knives did not reach within five inches of him, ok? Any way I had no choice but to deny everything, but then my mom was like "then why does he have cuts on his hands? he didn't do it himself!" (I would have) and now she hates me even more and blah blah blah. Do you know how hard it is to stay away from drugs right now? Being clinical is not easy, you hate everything and feel so horrible (don't worry I'm seeing the doctor), I almost took some stuff out of the bathroom last night but I didn't know what it was because the label was so worn that I decided it would be a bad idea. Any way I wish I was a rich only child for obvious reasons, very rich, like billionaire rich.

Monday, May 10, 2004

I think I might be clinical...

Holy crap, today was the most deppressing day ever! I was like, omg, I want to slit my wrists! Any way, the whole day I felt fat and ugly and wished I was rich so I could make my self un-ugly (yes, you can do that). I havent gone shopping for SO long because I feel so fat, the last time I went shopping was about 6 months ago, but I've saved up so much money I now have $950.00 and I am only 14 and have no job (I am NOT working for minimum wage ok?). I am dying of a freaking shopping defitiancy! God, I did not know adolesance was so tough, no wonder every body my age has some sort of problem, let it be eating disorders or a drug addiction or depression, we really are seriously screwed up. Any way, in my last class which is geography, are teacher went on about how the enviroment is so screwed up, and then he told us about all these kids that died because this shit company buried toxic waste right next to a school. I was so traumatized after that, I felt sick (you know when you hear something horrible like 9/11 and you feel like you're about to throw up?). Any way, I seriously want some pills, everything is making me sad! And today I found this creepy homeless person sitting on the side of the street, and I live in a small city! Then I noticed more homeless people! ARRRRGHHHH, lol I am so frustrated!
P.S. I really want the Dior girly logo saddle pouch, which I am going to buy, also a Louis Vuitton multi-colour planner/diary so I wont forget what I have for homework.

Monday, May 03, 2004

What the hell?

"What the hell?" was the question I asked while discovering the pictures and stories of what the British and American soldiers are doing to their Iraqi prisoners. Seriously, I thought the whole point of going into Iraq was to get rid of Sadam so they're wouldn't be any more torturing of the Iraqis. I didn't agree with the war, I was pretty sure is was to just get oil and Bush chose the wrong solution (I can't say that I was surprised though). And now we find out that the troops over there are torturing them? Seriously, what the hell? I took this from which has pictures too, I'm not going to post them because I don't know how, but take a look, I think everyone should see them.
I find that the intentional abuse of detainees by military police personnel included the following acts:

• Punching, slapping and kicking detainees; jumping on their naked feet.

• Videotaping and photographing naked male and female detainees.

• Forcibly arranging detainees in various sexually explicit positions for photographing.

• Forcing detainees to remove their clothing and keeping them naked for several days at a time.

• Forcing naked male detainees to wear women's underwear.

• Forcing groups of male detainees to masturbate themselves while being photographed and videotaped.

• Arranging naked male detainees in a pile and then jumping on them.

• Positioning a naked detainee on a box [of meals ready to eat], with a sandbag on his head, and attaching wires to his fingers, toes and penis to simulate electric torture.

• Writing "I am a Rapest" (sic) on the leg of a detainee alleged to have forcibly raped a 15-year-old fellow detainee, and then photographing him naked.

• Placing a dog chain or strap around a naked detainee's neck and having a female soldier pose for a picture.

• A male MP [military police] guard having sex with a female detainee.

• Using military working dogs (without muzzles) to intimidate and frighten detainees, and in at least one case biting and severely injuring a detainee.

• Taking photographs of dead Iraqi detainees.

In addition, several detainees also described the following acts of abuse, which under the circumstances, I find credible based on the clarity of their statements and supporting evidence provided by other witnesses:

• Breaking chemical lights and pouring the phosphoric liquid on detainees.

• Threatening detainees with a charged 9-millimeter pistol.

• Pouring cold water on naked detainees.

• Beating detainees with a broom handle and a chair.

• Threatening male detainees with rape.

• Allowing a military police guard to stitch the wound of a detainee who was injured after being slammed against the wall in his cell.

• Sodomizing a detainee with a chemical light and perhaps a broomstick.
This is just discusting, honestly, what is this world coming to?
check out for more info.

Any way all day I was in SUCH a bad mood today, probably because I woke up and the first thing I thought of was the torturing of Iraqi prisoners. So I got up, then decided it was too early and cold to be awake and then got back in bed. Then my mom came up yelling at me to get up (by the way I'm only 14 and in grade nine, I'm not some sad 30 year old that still lives with my perants) and so I got up, had a shower, got dressed, did my make-up, and got in the car. My mom drove me and I ran up the pavement stairs up to the school, god, waht a freaking ugly school. I walked through the doors and heard the national anthem, I am late, o well. Well I barely made it through my day, willing myself to care about the effects of media on adolescents (It still doesn't make me want to buy Dr. Pepper, ew), le francaise (that's actually important because I want to be a fashion designer, or just marry rich, either way french is important) and why M=slope and y=mx+b and b=y (who ever came up with math should be drug into the street and shot). Well I went home for lunch like everyday, ate three grape fruits and watched the View (I know what you're thinking, "get a life" well at my school everyone's life is drugs, literally, that's why everyone gets along, because they're all stoned, so I'd rather find out more details about Star Jones' fiance than take a hit of coke). Then I spoke to my my ADORABLE cousin, I'm serious he is the most beautiful child I have seen in my life, he could be a child model, his eye lashes are like a mile-long (jelous lol)! Any way he just turned five so I wished him happy birthday and spoke to my other cousin who is 7. They're Irish and apparently it's super warm over there while it's freezing cold over here. Any way that basically made my day, I only had one more class which is geography(honestly, when I am ever going to use Canadian geography in my life any way?). So my teacher talked to us about his trip to New York, and how he got to visit the most expensive hotel in New York, and he told us his amazement when there was a man in the toilets who cleaned up for you and such, WOW that is something I would never expect in an Upper East Side hotel (sarcasm). Any way then he just babbled on about how we're killing the earth, it's actually quite sad, but it's just annoying when he talkes about it. And then today I noticed even more white trash than usuall in my naighbor's back yard. I'm not one to spy on other people, but it's just hard to ignore seven full fledged mullets. :)

Sunday, May 02, 2004

Movie Reviews

I have recently seen two movies and I am going to tell you if you should see them or not.
On Friday I saw Whale Rider, starring Keisha Castle-Hughes (who was nominated for an Academy Award for best actress). This movie is almost magical, it really tells a story, in a way a legend would be told. Kiesha plays Pai, who's mother and twin brother both die during birth. Pai has broken the chain of chiefs, because she is a girl and girls cannot become chief. Pai struggles to prove to her grandfather and the rest of her tribe that she is strong enough to become a leader, while her grandfather sets up a school for boys to train them for becoming the new cheif. Go see it if you havent already, it's brilliant.
Last night I saw Mean Girls, starring Lindsay Lohan. This movie was actually sort of funny, I wasn't too interested in seeing it but my friends wanted to see it so I was just like what ever. When Cady (Lohan) comes back from Africa (where she was home-schooled) to a real high school she finds that all these people are really screwed up (on my judgement anyway). First, she meets this girl who I thought was gay but I guess wasn't and this guy who is supposed to be the stereo-type gay guy (a la Jack of Will & Grace) but is fat and dresses really badly but says fabulous allot, this actor can not portray a gay guy. Any way Cady gets invited to sit with the popular girls who for some reason are very, very stupid but dress well (yay!). For some reason they all have very big breasts for 16 year olds. They all lie behind each other's back and blah blah blah. This movie does have some truth in it, I mean the stuff that happens in the movie does happen in a real high school, except that the movie forgot the drugs, sex, shoplifting, sexual harassment, eating disorders, and god knows what else that really does happen in a real school that I’m not aware of. It was pretty good though, but wait till it comes out on DVD.
Any way I had a great day, after the movie we went to this cute little place at the university plaza (not as bad as it sounds, lots of ethnic foods and stuff) and I had bubble tea for the first time (not really tea, just like a smoothy with jello in it, it's sooo good though!). The we got back to their house and stayed up with their mom (she’s cool don't worry) and family friend Claire who sported numerous piercings, a shaved head and a nurse's outfit. We read magazines and prank called this guy called Stuart, we also found an add in a magazine for a thing called the "Nipplette", don’t ask, and we laughed for like 30 hours. Then we watched MadTV and then watched Cheaters(haha we’re so sad), then at 12:30 Claire drove me home, because she was going that way any way, I waved good bye and went in the ALREADY UNLOCKED back door.

Saturday, May 01, 2004

You never know

Yesterday at school we had an assembally at 8:15, way too early to even think, so we were all shunned out of our classes and into the auditorium. Trying to keep up with my friends, who for some reson are very energetic in the morning, I walked into the symphony-like room and sat down in one of the crappy chairs. All of a sudden some fat kid comes up and sits beside me in the last chair on the edge of the row. I looked over at him and noticed he's that dumb guy in my french class. He turned his head over and started to brag to his friends about the ''great hits of coke'' he had last night, so thats why he's so dumb. Well as he was yapping on and on to his drug addict friends the lights began to dim and the princepal or somebody yelled into the microphone for us to all shut up. Nobody listened to him so he got angry and whined about his job. One by one people stopped talking and he introduced a nurse to us. O great, not another STD assembally. Well it turns out it isn't an STD assembally after all (thank god) but an ''accident prevention'' assembally. So the nurse talks about how we can prevent ourselves from doing stupid things by thinking (I thought that was called common sense), and blah blah blah. Then she said that someone would like to talk to us, and a 25 yr. old guy walks up with his mom helping him because he was shaking quite at bit, and then he walked over, now shaking even more and holding on to one of those wheely walker things old ladies have to help them walk. He finally made it over to the end of the stage and sat down. ''Hi everybody!'' he said, but his voice was very slurred so it was hard to understand, ''Hi!'' said the students all together. I think everybody, even the coke guy sitting beside me knew that he had been in some sort of accident that left him disabled. He told us that 8 years ago he went to the same school we did, and he started to sing our school song. Everyone else was singing (I didnt though, I don't know the words, so I just clapped along), when I heard laughing behind me, ''Haha, a retarded persons singing hahaha,'' I whipped my head back and gave this acne coevered boy the dirtiest look I have ever made in my life, and his face turned even redder than the spots on his face. How discusting, what sort of person says something like that? Does he really want to go to hell when he dies? Well the guy on the stage started to tell us about his accident, he was in a crappy car and the weather was very bad, he had let his girlfriend drive but he shouldn't have because she had just got her liscence. He had broken some bones but he had major brain damge (it didnt leave him retarted, but he had some sort of connection thing wrong with his brain). He then showed us pictures on the huge screen at the front, of him after his accident. He told about how he was in a coma for 3 months and when he woke up he was so weak he couldn't eat or breath, so they had to hook him up to a resporator, and his mom fed im mushed up cheesies but alas, he does not like cheesies. He taught us about the three C's, um i think they were Connect? Critque and Create a situation to make sure it is safe and stuff. It was really heart breaking, and alot of people were crying, even though he was so up-beat. After wards he asked if there were any questions, and nobody answered, then he was like come on, there must be some questions! Somebody asked him if his girlfriend died, luckily no she didnt, she just had a knock on the head but she was really damadged emotionally, but who wouldn't be? Then someone aksed him a completely unappropriote question, are you and your girlfriend still together? OMG! HOW CAN YOU ASK THAT QUESTION? WHAT HAVE YOUR PARENTS TAUGHT YOU? No, they weren't still together, but these things happen. That was tough hearing him say that, because he actually sounded sad, and to make it worse there was a big awwwww after that. God I hate this school. After the guy's presentation, the nurse came back up and said ''You know, at another school where we came to talk to them about safety, a girl in the front row said that she hoped nothing like this would ever happen to her or her friends and family, and the next day her and her friend were both killed in a car crash. You should know that hope is not enough to keep you safe.'' Woah, what did you say? That is freaky! She actually died? I was so shocked, and that just made the day even more depressing.